Marriage is often treated as a major life achievement, but gospel musician Esther Smith says her own experience turned it into something she now approaches with caution.
She married Rev. Ahinkan Bonsu in the mid-2000s, but the relationship ended after roughly four years. The divorce became public around 2009 to 2010, drawing widespread attention and debate at the time.
Speaking on The Delay Show with Deloris Frimpong Manso, Esther Smith used the platform to deliver a direct message about resisting pressure to settle down for the sake of expectations.
“Don’t let anybody put pressure on you to marry,” she said firmly. “As a senior sister, that’s my advice to you.”
She explained that her warning comes from lived experience, especially during the peak of her music career when her rise in gospel music coincided with major personal shifts. Songs like “Ma Won Nsan” marked a high point, but she said that period also introduced changes that affected her trajectory.
“After ‘Ma Won Nsan’, marriage came into the picture. ‘Yesu Wo M’afa’ followed and I began to sink. It was a very hard time,” she revealed.
The discussion also touched on a broader social perception in Ghana about how marriage can affect successful women. Deloris Frimpong Manso observed it plainly during the interview:
“It looks like there is something that fights prominent women—and it’s mostly through marriage.”
Esther Smith did not generalise her experience as a universal outcome, but she acknowledged how external pressure and expectations can shape critical life decisions. She recalled how family influence played a role in her thinking at the time.
“When I gained prominence, my father spoke to me about marriage—that I’m the only daughter, I’m growing, age is catching up,” she said. “I was about 26. If he hadn’t mentioned it, my mind wouldn’t have been there.”
She also pointed to her environment as a contributing factor, noting that frequent weddings within her church community made the idea more appealing.
“‘Wedding’ became a thing at House of Faith Church, so it attracted me,” she said.
Looking back, she believes the timing of her decision came with consequences for her career focus.
“My vision was dimmed because of marriage,” she admitted.
Now speaking from hindsight, Esther Smith is urging women, particularly those in the public eye, to prioritise clarity of purpose and avoid rushing into marriage due to pressure.
“Even if you’re not married, you can adopt a child,” she added. “Don’t marry for someone to play with your heart.”
She also offered advice to married women going through difficulties, encouraging patience and spiritual grounding.
“Be prayerful,” she said. “But don’t let anybody push you into marriage.”
Despite the reflective tone, her comments also carried appreciation for Deloris Frimpong Manso’s path. She suggested that her success story might have taken a different direction if she had married early.
“Maybe if you had hurriedly married, we wouldn’t have had Delay Foods,” Esther Smith stated.
