Archbishop Nicholas Duncan-Williams has weighed in on what he believes lies at the heart of the growing struggles many couples face in marriage, arguing that commitment, preparation, and purpose matter far more than emotion alone.
Appearing on TV3’s New Day with Cookie Tee on Friday, January 23, 2026, the Founder and General Overseer of Action Chapel International said marriage is often misunderstood as a union driven mainly by love, when in reality it demands responsibility and maturity.
He explained that biological identity does not automatically translate into marital readiness, stressing that being a woman does not necessarily mean one is prepared to be a wife, just as being a man does not automatically qualify someone as a husband or father.
“One reason many women are not married is that they are not wife material. In the same way, some men are not husband material,” he said. “There is a difference between being a woman and being a wife, and between being a man and being a husband or father.”
According to the archbishop, many people step into marriage without understanding the weight of the role they are taking on. He noted that someone who struggles to manage their own life will likely find it difficult to care for a spouse or raise a family.
He was also careful to clarify that readiness for marriage is not measured by wealth or financial status.
“I’m not talking about having a lot of money,” he said. “I’m talking about being prepared, ready, and responsible. You must be able to take care of another person.”
Drawing from scripture, Archbishop Duncan-Williams emphasized that marriage is rooted in purpose rather than emotion. He pointed to the biblical phrase, “For this purpose shall a man leave his father and mother,” noting that it does not frame marriage around love alone.
“This shows that marriage is about purpose, and purpose comes with responsibility,” he said.
He also highlighted the role families play in shaping future marriages, arguing that parents must be intentional about preparing their children for marital life.
“Mothers must train their daughters to become wives, and fathers must train their sons to become husbands and fathers,” he said. “These things are not properly taught in our schools.”
The archbishop added that becoming a suitable partner is a process of growth, not something that happens automatically at birth.
“You are born a woman, but you become a wife. You are born a man, but you become a husband,” he said.
Warning against rushing into marriage, Archbishop Duncan-Williams said lack of maturity often leads to deep challenges, particularly among young couples.
“I have seen many people, including some of my own children who married before the age of 30, face serious challenges. Marriage needs maturity,” he stated.
